Guess I Have It In Me Afterall

What does it mean that I don't even really think about the last guy I had sex with (a month ago, but who's counting) as much as I used to anymore?

I mean, I don't have one night stands. I don't. And I wouldn't really consider him to be a one night stand (even though I left the next day for a different island) because he wasn't a stranger. I knew him ... well as much as you can get to know a person in five days.

The point is, after the fact, it was all I could do to not think about him -- about how his kiss was the best kiss I've ever had in my life -- including my boyfriend of seven years. I don't know what it was, but his kiss was perfect. Fireworks perfect, and I hate clichés. I can say with confidence that I have experienced the perfect kiss and that if I died tomorrow, it would be okay with me.

Anyways. My point is that I don't really think about him. And not because he's not a great guy. We've talked a few times since I've been back but not often since he is still on vacation. Although he leaves soon to go back home to Australia, so who knows if that will take our communication to the next level. But, I've even stopped looking at his picture. It's like I've totally removed myself from him and what happened between us. Which is weird because I'm not that person -- the one who can have the one night stand and not feel anything after the fact and just chalk it up to a good time.

But I guess this is what happens when one is on vacation. It's almost like all the logical rules that I've had or felt when it comes to guys just kind of goes out the window and I enter the anything goes mode of my psyche.

I feel like such a dude. I should probably go on vacation more often. But I gotta be honest -- if a guy doesn't kiss me like my Aussie did, there is no chance it will go any further than that.