I'll Trade You A Reiki Session For A Cupcake

My former student has turned into a hardcore gambler.

At first? It was just trading Pokemon cards.

But now? He's upped the stakes. He traded his teddy bear for a cookie. And started wailing when he realized that that wasn't the smartest trade he could have made because the cookie now resided in his stomach and his bear was gone. So he cried and cried until his new teacher told cookie hoarder to give back the teddy bear.

These are the kinds of issues that I deal with on a daily basis. As soon as my friend told me this story I cracked up. He traded his teddy bear for a cookie. A teddy bear. For a cookie. How ridiculous is that?

Tomorrow I'm bringing in my vintage Barbie doll (vintage because she is now old enough to drink legally) to see if I could trade it for a cupcake. I won't even cry when my doll is gone. However there is no promising that I won't cry after my cupcake has resorted to sad little crumbs.

Did you know that as of Saturday I am now a Reiki Practitioner? Of course you didn't. Unless you've got me under surveillance. Which would be kind of exciting for me. [Smiling and staring at nothing in particular. How does my hair look?]

So now? I can give Reiki sessions to people and charge them something like sixty to seventy-five dollars an hour. Um, where do I sign up? I have to admit though that I kinda feel dirty taking money from people. Okay that's not entirely true. I had no problems collecting my fee when I tutored. But this seems different somehow. Reiki is supposed to be therapeutic and spiritual and healing, in a sense. It's like me going to church and them expecting a payment for my attendance. Oh wait ... the collection that goes around ... never mind.

But in all honesty, I don't feel comfortable giving Reiki treatments just yet. I still feel new to it all. I could always give myself Reiki. Or any stray animals I may come across. Oh! I can Reiki my food and drink so that I will have positive energy running through me all day long and all night long!

All joking aside, Reiki is pretty neat. When I was giving a Reiki session on Saturday, I swear I could feel the energy flowing between my hands. It felt like this ball that I was trying to push together and it would resist. So cool. And no I'm not a kook. I haven't told many people about this because it's hard for me to explain what it is without sounding all new age. But this practice has been around for hundreds of years, originating in Japan. And let's face it ... Japanese people are pretty smart. You won't find them acting like douche bags, pouting for the camera and wearing tight tight tight tight shirts with cum stains on them.

I don't really have a point to this post.

I guess if I had to sum up, it would be to never trade a non-edible item for an edible item because someone will wind up in tears and that Reiki is not the Japanese word for crazy new-age gimmick.